Dating tips for divorcees
But if you were thinking that searching for companionship online is strictly for losers or perverts, forget it — that's as outmoded as dial-up.
"Online dating is not only mainstream, it's one of the best ways to widen your search, rather than just hoping that you'll meet someone in the coffee shop," says Dr. And these days, there's a site for everyone, from e Harmony and Match to niche sites like JDate.
For a couple of reasons: First, you're not putting all your eggs — or hopes — into one basket.
Second, you can compare what you like and don't like.
Accept invitations to parties." While it's not unheard of for a woman wounded by a painful divorce to make statements like "all men are jerks" or "all the good ones are taken," that's obviously not a good mindset to have going into dating, says Dr. "That kind of thinking can tank your mood — and cause you to limit your chances of getting out there and finding love." By forcing yourself to keep your negative thoughts in check, you'll soon be in the habit of thinking optimistically, which will in turn make you more ready to date again. You've decided to start dating — isn't that your "intention" right there? "Dating can be a way to sharpen your social skills too." And, of course, a way to get out of the house and have some fun!
"You can see what you might want in a relationship going forward," she says, even if it's not with any of these guys. Kirschner fully supports seeing multiple people at one time when you first start dating, she does say there's one caveat: making sure everyone knows.
If it's truly awful, you can take a step back and wait some more. Gadoua, who runs dating workshops for women, asks them to free-associate words that come to mind when they think of "dating." Not surprisingly, words like "awful" and "dreadful" come up.