Dating after a relationship
Don’t see these responsibilities as obstacles – they are just different things to consider when you are meeting new people.” Dating may have been scary when you were 18, but it can be even more daunting when you’re a grown-up and have ‘forgotten’ how to date. “I don’t think you should have anything to hide – if you want to mention you have kids, or you’ve come out of a long-term relationship, that is fine,” she explains. If someone is dating purely for sex, fun and flirting, there isn’t a need to give away too much personal information.You may want to remain relatively anonymous and just have a good time.” “If someone is looking for a long-term committed relationship though, it’s better to be upfront and transparent.
With the accessibility of online dating, people are quite happy to meet up during the week for a coffee. Amanda says coming out of a long-term relationship can often mean we need to look at how we want to represent ourselves.
Try and seek out a buddy who is in a similar situation.
It can feel less isolating if you can chat to someone about your experiences, they understand, and you can debrief together.
You can no longer split the domestic duties, and for many people transitioning through kids custody issues, juggling kids, work and, well, life, can be tough.
But Amanda says if there is a way to manage your responsibilities and find time to meet new people.
Amanda has counselled hundreds of individuals and couples, and, as a lecturer in psychosexual therapy and sexual health counselling at Sydney University, is an expert in the field.