Dating a woman with emotion baggage
The Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation is a Strategic Partner.more It may seem that new relationships are entirely fuelled by dreams and hopes for a perfect future.Once you are aware of your transference patterns and recognise triggering cues, make a plan that highlights these signals (the IF) and link it to a new way of behaving (the THEN).
But it’s not just childhood relationships that shape us – adult relationship histories can also influence relationships.With time and practice, you should become more aware of these cues the moment they occur and this provides an opportunity to respond differently.One piece of advice I have found useful is to use an IF-THEN plan.As a simple example, someone who had an unfaithful partner in the past may develop a working model in which other people cannot be trusted.
This may mean that he or she finds it more difficult to form stable, trusting relationships in the future.
But the past can have a powerful influence too – often more so than we would like to admit.